WICHITA, KS – A new study published by TIME Magazine states that “2/3 of the American public don’t know what state they’re in. In a “step right up for 10 dollars!” style session, Radish correspondents tried the same thing and asked 100 Americans in Wichita what state they were in. 5 said America, 20 said Kansas, 47 said something about the Wizard of Oz, and 28 said Texas. This is assumed to be a direct cause of people simply being dumbasses. But hey, it’s Wichita. Half of the people there own 20+ cows on a ranch.

The second and third trials of this experiment were held in Fargo, ND, and Bozeman, MT, soliciting similar results among the population.